The Hope of Friendship

Photos by Shannon Carter

Varona admits that some days are more difficult for Mikey than others. "I know that this is apart of his condition, we can't change their condition," Varona said. "[As caregivers] all we can do is help to make their day better." (Shannon Carter | Scene Magazine)

As were many, Uver was left jobless after the arrival of the COVID-19 pandemic and unsure of what steps to take next. After being a sushi chef for 11 years, and the prospects of getting back into the kitchen during the pandemic appearing dim, Uver filed for unemployment and found himself turning towards faith.

“I want to do good,” said the 44-year-old caregiver at Access Homecare Services, Uver Varona.

Access Home Care Service, has a self proclaimed goal to be a community based program. They aim not to babysit the consumers they assist but instead guide them and teach them safety and how to work.

Varona was not a churchgoing person, but unemployed and with nothing to do, he was persuaded by his aunt to begin volunteering at Desert Vineyard Church’s food bank. This seemingly small decision led to a career change, a life change and the beginning of Varona’s friendship with Mikey Pedroza.

Pedroza is a 24-year-old film lover with a mild intellectual disability and is on the autism spectrum. The duo can almost always be found towards the back of the thrift store dusting and re-organizing the movie collection.

Working for his community at the church flipped a switch in Varona’s mind for the first time in over a decade, allowing him to visualize himself in a career outside the restaurant. Beginning as a volunteer, he quickly moved his way up and became volunteer coordinator, managing tens of people including special-needs children and older adults at the food bank.

“I became really passionate about helping special-needs people and I got the job at Access, by just luck and passion. Literally the grace of god. Working through the church is how I wound up here.”

— Uver Varona

He then came to a decision to pursue a career that would allow him to do more of this type of work.

“Through volunteering through the church, I wanted to continue to do non-profit work,” said Varona. “I didn’t want to go back to the kitchen, I said ‘f-that, not my type of thing’, I don’t ever want to step foot in a kitchen again. I still have all my chef coats.”

Varona credits his faith for guiding him towards uncovering a new desire for this type of work.

“I became really passionate about helping special-needs people and I got the job at Access, by just luck and passion. Literally the grace of god. Working through the church is how I wound up here.”

Varona has been helping to guide Mikey who has been working at the Hope of the Valley thrift store in Santa Clarita since January. Mikey volunteers at the thrift shop twice a week. (Shannon Carter | Scene Magazine)

It was through one of the programs at Access that Varona was paired with Pedroza, and began working with him and building a bond. Varona helps guide Pedroza while he volunteers at one of the five Hope of the Valley thrift store locations in Southern California.

Pedroza is very diligent when sifting through the cart of incoming movies and pays special attention to some of his favorite movies on the shelf including Casper, Barney, and his favorite superhero Spider-Man. He is known to buy a movie two or three times if he really loves it.

However, Pedroza also has an affinity for all things horror and gore. He and Varona are already planning their 2022 Halloween costumes together and are debating about who will get to be Michael Myers from the Halloween movie series..

“I think it’s great. When we first met Uver he was very energetic, and had all the qualifications in his attitude and demeanor. So yes it is an extreme to go from being a sushi chef to being a caregiver but his connection and his bond with Mikey is great,” said Varona’s supervisor, and administrator at Access Home Care Services, Alejandra Gutierrez.

Despite their great connection, being a caregiver is not easy, high paying, nor common for a man.

“It was a very big taboo years back, to even have a child with a mental health disability or any intellectual disability and health services were predominantly done by women. It’s very hard to find individual male staff to work in this field,” Gutierrez said. “Out of 20 applications we may receive only one male applicant.”

Both Varona and Gutierrez share the same belief that there has been a long lasting stigma that men do not belong in positions within the mental health field, especially in regards to providing care to consumers with special needs. For a long time, being a caregiver, nurse or any other similar job has been thought to be meant for a woman.

“I felt his kind of work was really important. There’s such a need, this community is so underserved. There’s not enough male caregivers out there because we don’t think we can be caregivers because it’s kind of perceived as a feminine job, which is a really big myth,” Varona said. “And I encouraged my other friends to apply and do this kind of work.”

More than about 75% of all caregivers are female and spend about 50% more time providing care then male caregivers, according to the Family Caregiver Alliance. Male caregivers are also less likely to provide personal care to the consumers that they assist.

“The pay is not great. And you know from the beginning of time it hasn’t been a ‘male field’. There’s this attitude where people say to men ‘Oh you can’t be a nurse, you have to work in construction, be a policeman, a fireman,” Gutierrez said. “No one ever says you need to be a nurse, a caregiver, or a mental health physician.”

The average caregiver makes roughly only $16 dollars an hour, according to multiple job listing sites for caregivers. Although the pay does not reflect the need or level of patience and empathy the job entails, the impact it makes in people’s lives is invaluable, stresses Gutierrez.

“Mikey’s mom has seen a difference, like he is now wanting to be out in the community and not so enclosed in his room and just playing video games. Mikey goes bowling and sometimes he and Uver will go to the mall,” Gutierrez said. “The variety of things that Uver does with him and how Mikey wants to be out of the house now and not so inclined to staying indoors, has made a big difference.”

The pair have developed a secret handshake, unique to their friendship. Although they are good friends, they too share their disagreements. Pedroza openly accuses Varona of cheating at bowling on the Wii, to which Varona only partially admits to. Luckily, Pedroza is very forgiving and their friendship will carry on.